Scene cuts to home ministry. Shi* Raj Futile on phone with Dr MoonyMoony Singh
Shi* Raj Futile –“ Doc, 8th terrorist episode this year alone and still one more month to go before the year ends, you need to increase my salary so that I can get new BandGalas stitched as a monthly affair. Anyway, latest news is that 100 people have died and I am ready with my written speech for the BombAway trip. What else do you suggest”
MoonyMoony Singh – “Oh my god! Each of those 420 MLAs in BombAway legislature have A to Z security with Laal Batti cars, assault weapon touting, marine training enabled commandos. Lash Rao even has 4 bullet proof armoured vehicles, why is all that infrastructure not being mobilized to respond to terrorists since the last 12 hours?”
Shi* Raj Futile –“Doc, no point in being so logical all the time, did you not get any coalition Dharma lessons from Trash Karat all this while? Faulticians are national assets and must be protected, its the common citizen and the common dog that does the womb to bomb to tomb routine. Phoneya Ji has said send NSG commando so you just rubber stamp the order to wake NSG commandos up, arrange for a plane and send them”
MoonyMoony Singh thinking –“Plane… plane…. oh ho..the only one that was airworthy and free has been taken by Mrs P Futile on her weekend break, she got really tired in her only official duty this week bestowing heavy award trophies in a ceremony and wanted to taste some south asian food. …let me see if PraFool Patel can order something that flies from AI hangars. You call Army HQ and ask them to get NSG commandos ready.”
Scene cuts to Army NSG HQ.
Shi* Raj Futile –“NSG Chief, round up your men, we have to send them in the harm’s way”
NSG Chief –“Sir, what happened to our pay raise issue? Your ministry has decided that our commandos should now get lesser salary than a CM’s driver. Our minister AK NothingHoni anyway doesn’t do or say anything on this. We will give our lives on your order but while we are alive, we need to be paid”
Shi* Raj Futile –“Oh ho, you soldiers have become too greedy, just in the last pay commission, we had approved 24 eggs in monthly ration for you. Don’t forget that. This time a 100% raise has been given to bureaucRATS by themselves and we will address your issues in the next pay commission in 2012. March your men up, play some patriotic songs in their plane and in the BEST bus that is waiting for them at BombAway airport.”
NSG Chief issuing orders to men – “ATTENTION ! GET UP, SHUT UP and PUT UP with what’s being thrown at you. Go, rescue BombAway. Jai Hind”
Scene cuts to BombAway hotels under siege. MEdiA Culpa is covering the incident and breaking its breaking news every 2nd minute. By this time there are more camera flashes and news flashes than policemen flashing their badges. The terrorists are now being shot first by newsmen 100 mtrs away from the hotel and then by the policemen a further 500 mtrs away.
MEdiA Culpa – “News hungry nation, I will whet your appetite for gore and blood. While my eyes are set on the duty to keep you informed, my camera eye is set on getting best footage for my TRPs and your eyes set on my screen will get me my Ad revenues. If I don’t report, somebody else will. In this race to the ringing cash register, the one who shows the most graphic details of bombs/bullets/bodies/blood/death/destruction/combat/mayhem/suffering, wins. Enough is never enough and in any case, the camera doesn’t exult or grieve in what it shows, it just shows what is. If you don’t like the message I bring you, don’t shoot the messenger”
BEST bus carrying NSG personnel creaks to a stop outside Taj, another at Oberoi. Men alight, take positions and start fighting the terrorist gallantly. They don’t have floorplans of the hotels and are fighting blind. They go room by room, shooting, clearing and sanitizing the 1000 room hotels. Inch by inch they conquer the million sq foot of devastated real estate. Shattered glass, concrete, spent ammunition shells, grenade shrapnel, strewn human bodies and the overpowering stench of mayhem and death is all around them. It’s a painful process, with their lives at risk they go on......there are terrorists to kill and hostages to save. Some hostages are dying, some are crying, some are injured, hungry, thirsty, some are scared and all scarred forever. The operation continues for 59 hrs, MEdiA Culpa covering every millisecond of it and an increasingly angry nation watches.
What will MoonyMoony Singh do now?
Will India stand with a straight spine and in a loud voice, demand retribution from the perpetrators?
Will Indians stand up and demand basic right of protection of life from their faulticians? 61 years of independence hasn’t secured a job, a roof, food and water for the population, now add life itself to that list.
Will a dog glance at Major Unnikrishnan’s house, now that he is not alive?
Will Pandoo havaldar get a replacement of AK47 instead of his danda?
To know all this, watch this space for the next episode……….
Shi* Raj Futile –“ Doc, 8th terrorist episode this year alone and still one more month to go before the year ends, you need to increase my salary so that I can get new BandGalas stitched as a monthly affair. Anyway, latest news is that 100 people have died and I am ready with my written speech for the BombAway trip. What else do you suggest”
MoonyMoony Singh – “Oh my god! Each of those 420 MLAs in BombAway legislature have A to Z security with Laal Batti cars, assault weapon touting, marine training enabled commandos. Lash Rao even has 4 bullet proof armoured vehicles, why is all that infrastructure not being mobilized to respond to terrorists since the last 12 hours?”
Shi* Raj Futile –“Doc, no point in being so logical all the time, did you not get any coalition Dharma lessons from Trash Karat all this while? Faulticians are national assets and must be protected, its the common citizen and the common dog that does the womb to bomb to tomb routine. Phoneya Ji has said send NSG commando so you just rubber stamp the order to wake NSG commandos up, arrange for a plane and send them”
MoonyMoony Singh thinking –“Plane… plane…. oh ho..the only one that was airworthy and free has been taken by Mrs P Futile on her weekend break, she got really tired in her only official duty this week bestowing heavy award trophies in a ceremony and wanted to taste some south asian food. …let me see if PraFool Patel can order something that flies from AI hangars. You call Army HQ and ask them to get NSG commandos ready.”
Scene cuts to Army NSG HQ.
Shi* Raj Futile –“NSG Chief, round up your men, we have to send them in the harm’s way”
NSG Chief –“Sir, what happened to our pay raise issue? Your ministry has decided that our commandos should now get lesser salary than a CM’s driver. Our minister AK NothingHoni anyway doesn’t do or say anything on this. We will give our lives on your order but while we are alive, we need to be paid”
Shi* Raj Futile –“Oh ho, you soldiers have become too greedy, just in the last pay commission, we had approved 24 eggs in monthly ration for you. Don’t forget that. This time a 100% raise has been given to bureaucRATS by themselves and we will address your issues in the next pay commission in 2012. March your men up, play some patriotic songs in their plane and in the BEST bus that is waiting for them at BombAway airport.”
NSG Chief issuing orders to men – “ATTENTION ! GET UP, SHUT UP and PUT UP with what’s being thrown at you. Go, rescue BombAway. Jai Hind”
Scene cuts to BombAway hotels under siege. MEdiA Culpa is covering the incident and breaking its breaking news every 2nd minute. By this time there are more camera flashes and news flashes than policemen flashing their badges. The terrorists are now being shot first by newsmen 100 mtrs away from the hotel and then by the policemen a further 500 mtrs away.
MEdiA Culpa – “News hungry nation, I will whet your appetite for gore and blood. While my eyes are set on the duty to keep you informed, my camera eye is set on getting best footage for my TRPs and your eyes set on my screen will get me my Ad revenues. If I don’t report, somebody else will. In this race to the ringing cash register, the one who shows the most graphic details of bombs/bullets/bodies/blood/death/destruction/combat/mayhem/suffering, wins. Enough is never enough and in any case, the camera doesn’t exult or grieve in what it shows, it just shows what is. If you don’t like the message I bring you, don’t shoot the messenger”
BEST bus carrying NSG personnel creaks to a stop outside Taj, another at Oberoi. Men alight, take positions and start fighting the terrorist gallantly. They don’t have floorplans of the hotels and are fighting blind. They go room by room, shooting, clearing and sanitizing the 1000 room hotels. Inch by inch they conquer the million sq foot of devastated real estate. Shattered glass, concrete, spent ammunition shells, grenade shrapnel, strewn human bodies and the overpowering stench of mayhem and death is all around them. It’s a painful process, with their lives at risk they go on......there are terrorists to kill and hostages to save. Some hostages are dying, some are crying, some are injured, hungry, thirsty, some are scared and all scarred forever. The operation continues for 59 hrs, MEdiA Culpa covering every millisecond of it and an increasingly angry nation watches.
What will MoonyMoony Singh do now?
Will India stand with a straight spine and in a loud voice, demand retribution from the perpetrators?
Will Indians stand up and demand basic right of protection of life from their faulticians? 61 years of independence hasn’t secured a job, a roof, food and water for the population, now add life itself to that list.
Will a dog glance at Major Unnikrishnan’s house, now that he is not alive?
Will Pandoo havaldar get a replacement of AK47 instead of his danda?
To know all this, watch this space for the next episode……….
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